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Gnarled fingers and broken youth

 Trust Psychiatrist, Central Locality Team, Barnet, Enfield and Haringey Mental Health NHS Trust, London, England

Date of Submission27-Jun-2020
Date of Acceptance13-Jul-2020

Correspondence Address:
Deeksha Elwadhi,
Halliwick Centre, St. Ann's Hospital, London N15 3TH
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Source of Support: None, Conflict of Interest: None

DOI: 10.4103/injr.injr_169_20

How to cite this URL:
Elwadhi D. Gnarled fingers and broken youth. Indian J Rheumatol [Epub ahead of print] [cited 2021 Apr 13]. Available from:

Standing on the edge of time,

An uneven precipice.

I try to walk tall,

But, my bones have just shrunk so small.

As much as I try to hold,

My hands feel hard as stone.

I miss the freedom of movements,

Feeling caged,

In my own body's rage.

As I wonder

Why do I fight against me,

The spirit captured,

Waiting to be set free,

As my own self dwindles and depletes.

I see myself pass through the stages of this malady,

My friend became my foe,

My gnarled fingers its trophy to show.

I try my hand at an unequal barter,

My soul a hostage lurking in the corner,

It stared, and mocked,

And it stalked me,

Things I could do,

Beings I could be,

Lives I could live,

It just makes me wonder.

But still I stand on the precipice,

My own immunity my only vice.

Still, I look forth for a day in future,

When all this will make sense.

When my immunity might just realize,

That I and it are friends.

Till then I pray with my gnarled fingers,

And this ray of hope lingers.

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Conflicts of interest

There are no conflicts of interest.


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